Advice Thread
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Ihmisen

Posts: 166
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Posted: 12:04AM Dec 24, 2012 |
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Figured this may as well be given a shot. Assuming it has not already.
Thread rules pretty simple. If you have a problem, go ahead and post it. If you have an idea for a solution for someone's problem, go ahead and be a decent person and help them. If for whatever reason you feel uncomfortable posting under your own alias, feel free to use a proxy. My box, for example, is always open and I'll post anything you want me to on your behalf. (Not to say others wouldn't. I'm sure they would)
Should cover it. Yes, this is somewhat inspired by the Ask Kenzie thread. Just more general so everyone can be helpful.
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koin_era345 

Posts: 257
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Posted: 11:21AM Dec 25, 2012 |
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I was wondering if something like this would come along. No serious problems right now, but I'd be happy to help.
"You lick your palms. It's a little childish and stupid, but then, so is high school." - Ferris Bueller |
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charlottes-odd 

Posts: 175
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Posted: 02:48PM Dec 25, 2012 |
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Ill also be more than happy to help, everyone needs support sometimes 
Im also expecting myself to be asking for help at some point
Heartbreak is where creativity is born |
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Ihmisen

Posts: 166
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Posted: 06:02PM Dec 25, 2012 |
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So...I'll throw this out there, get us going, hopefully get god advice in the process 
I have a friend, right. We've been friends since the beginning of middle school. Now we're about to graduate high school in one semester and we suddenly stopped talking. She'll still say hi and when she talks she's really friendly. Thing is, she's really aloof lately. I try talking to her on the busride home, but she says hi and then puts her headphones back on and listens to music some more.
Same thing in the halls or pretty much anywhere. Kinda hard to maintain a friendship with no real way to communicate. Further, I'm kinda worried about her. I guess I could talk to the school's social worker (whom I'm on really good terms wit, by the way) to check on her. I know she's dealt wth some stuff so...yea.
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charlottes-odd 

Posts: 175
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Posted: 07:37PM Dec 25, 2012 |
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Ive been in a similar situation myself with mates, so i know that it can be quite hard to deal with.
There can be a lot of reasons why shes acting like this, so i would suggest talking to her about whats going on. This can be difficult, but all you need to do is say to her is 'hi i need to talk to you', and just say that shes pushing you away and you want to resolve the problem. There may be some issues that shes going through, and if so let her know that youre there for her and want to help with whats going on. She may not even notice that shes becoming distant from you. The best case scenario is that you can work things out and remain friends. Afterall if you can work through a problem with a friend and resolve it, it will make the friendship even stronger.
However the worst case scenario would be that you tell her you want to resolve the problem but she wont give you the oppurtunity to talk to her. If so give her some time then try again. If she still acts the same and wont talk to you then i would say that she not a real friend. If you tell her youre there for her and want to resolve the issue and she still pushes you away, then shes not worth your time.
I know it can be difficult to go through losing a friend, and hopefully that wont happen to you, but if it does then you have to remember that you tried your hardest to keep the friendship going and she didnt want to know. People like that just dont deserve to have a mate that cares for them and your better off without. No matter what someones going through they should never push away a friend.
Ive lost mates due to reasons such as them treating me badly, not being there for me, lying, back stabbing, and other reasons, and it so difficult to go through, but now im in a better position than them with mates who i can trust and are supportive of me. My old mates were negative influences on me, and if id stayed in that group of people id probably be doing drugs and other such things as them, and luckily im not. So i know what youre going through but remember if a friendship fails you will be in a better position than they are, Afterall you tried and they didnt want to know, and its them missing out not you.
I sincerely hope things work out for you please let us know how it goes!
Heartbreak is where creativity is born |
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